Product Review : Flower / Bud

Grape Ape by C.R.A.F.T.

Grape Ape is big, dumb, and purple. Also this weed is nice and soothing.
StrainGrape Ape
Price Point$110 / 1/2 oz. ($7.86 / gram)
Listed THC28.14%
Purchased02/28/23 from CRAFT

Okay so I am really just reviewing a free gram. So that explains the pictures. I listed the price out so that this would not immediately jump to the top of the stats for low price and high thc because that would be weird. But anyways – I only have a little bit of this grass because it came free with the signup of a new customer. Like they do at the places where they sell the weed.

Grape Ape was originally a Hanna Barbera character. Like Grape Ape, I feel big, stupid, and purple. Unlike Grape Ape, I rarely solve mysteries with a bunch of hip young teens. But I am open to that lifestyle change should it become available.

The Grape Ape here is not, of course, a cartoon character. It is weed that I have smoked and am now talking about. That pretty much brings us back to the present moment.

I have smoked about a bowl of this. I am finding that it comes on a little creepy and has a nice, calming effect. It is definitely purple for a reason and pretty indica-sided.

This isn’t necessarily the kind of weed that I, as a user, seek out, but it’s not at all bad. If I reached for weed to just really knock me out – this would be a great choice. It’s not so much cognitively interruptive as it is physically numbing. In a very nice way of course. So I feel a little like I have marshmallow fingers while I type.

Strength : 8/10

It’s pretty strong and you feel it in your bones. Like a sauna of a high. My shoulders are kinda baked. It’s not overwhelming debilitating mentally, though. I can still make many word usements of great import and sustainability. Or maybe it does make you stupid but you’re so fluffy you forget.

Taste : 7/10

Honestly, nothing to write home about here. It smells a little like a funky cheese when ground up, and hits smooth-ish but has some cough to it. Nothing unpleasant, but taste was not the area in which this weed stood out.

Appearance : 8/10

For a free gram, this shit looks awesome. So I am scoring it a little high even though the buds are small because in order to be aa dimebag they kind of have to be. They’re still in great shape and looking pretty rad, though, if you look at the pics up top.

Overall Score : 23/30

This was way the best free weed I have received from a dispensary. I am used to giveaways being essentially a way for dispensaries to unload old or shitty product on people, and it was a very pleasant surprise that this was little just a small bag of the same weed I might have bought from them that day. And overall this was a great strain if you are into vibing with the universe on a very physical level. Which is not a bad thing.