Product Review : Flower / Bud

Nino Brown By Ball Family Farms

This weed has nothing to lose, much to gain. In your brain, you'll have a capitalist migraine.
BrandBall Family Farms
StrainNino Brown
Price Point$55 / 3.5g ($15.71 / gram)
Listed THC32.77%
Purchased01/29/23 from Harborside

So I fired up some New Jack Hustler (Nino’s Theme) on my Spotify and took this weed for a spin. Far be it for me to criticize, but was there a moment where these folks questioned naming a cannabis strain after a crack kingpin from a 30 year old movie? It just seems odd. I do like the bag art, for what it’s worth, though I will say that spending 55 bucks on an eighth of weed I can’t see is a little vexing; generally we use jars on the top shelf here which to me is appropriate. If you look at the photos – this bud has broken apart and gotten a little shaky in transit because of the packaging.

I’m not saying you shouldn’t sell weed in bags. that would be weird. But if you’re going to charge almost 60 bucks for an eighth – maybe make sure that the bud is in the best shape possible and spring for the jar. I don’t like what we’re doing to the planet either but until I can come in with my own jar and have you fill it up (which you can in some states) I’d just prefer a jar on the top shelf.

That being said – obviously the visual condition of the bud doesn’t have much effect on how bud smokes, and this bud smokes terrifically. The buds are softer and juicier than they may look, and ground up a treat for the bong. So really no complaints on any of that.

Also – this is a reasonably interesting and complicated high; I don’t just feel like I got punched in the face. I feel like I got punched in the face by a melting fist with trails and such. There’s other stuff going on in here a bit and it’s not just a brute force bud like you might associate with it’s namesake. Like I would think a Nino Brown bud would mug me and leave me drooling, but it’s more tender than that. I think Willie Mays Hayes would have been a much more apt name, all things considered.

Strength : 8/10

Nino was a decently strong high. Right in the platonic middle between indica and sativa; I was held suspended in a higher form of inaction. Very similar to Sidney “Syd” Deane before he comes to terms with his shortcomings and grows wiser along with his teammate and friend, Billy Hoyle.

Taste : 8/10

A little lemon-hinted with traces of pine and a skunky after taste. This weed took control of the palate in a notable way, much like Detective Harlan Regis as he investigated a crime at an address that changed all the rules like a champ.

Appearance : 7/10

Not the most attractive bud in the world. Again – the bag for packaging for expensive weed – this is a thing I have a small issue with. It’s not just the rough trade it experiences in transit; it’s the obfuscation of the product prior to purchase. Like it’s a shame I can’t just open the jar or whatever – but at least I can see what’s inside it. Instead the bud is hidden. much like Mark J. Sheridan as he eluded the not insignificant efforts of Chief Deputy U.S. Marshal Sam Gerard and co.

Overall Score : 23/30

Ever since Wildcats, Wesley Snipes has wowed audiences with a white hot intensity that is unrivaled.

This was pretty good weed. It made me feel guilty, much like Trumaine, who said so much while not saying very much at all.

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